I could spend a lifetime trying to get things right
But, you will still lose the will to stay by my side
To watch me thrive
To be alive

I am socially acceptable to your friends when it suits your plans
Otherwise, I belong by the roadside
At least I have the starlight to protect me through the night
Whilst the rain and hail plummeting my skin
Where do I begin?

You dare not look within and see what you have become
You have this unrealistic perception of how my life should be
You believe that I have ruined this family
But what you choose not to see is the way I am managing life without you by my side
You choose years ago, separate me from your world and now the distance has grown apart

We belong in different universes
For now, we are in a different galaxy and that is difficult for me
Yet, I have accepted that these broken years have affected us all
You only to choose to remember when I fall
Not when I am standing tall

I know you have witness pain, despair and having me as a sister isn’t fair
Unfortunately, I am irreplaceable
Whether you choose to see the leaves fall rather flowers to blossom
I cannot follow your commands anymore
I am sorry for now
I will have to hold onto the memories that are all around
Whilst you find another sound

Maybe I will never be your version of perfection
I understand that you are still made over the years that have passed
I cannot change the past but only move forward into a bright future
With or without you in my life
With or without you by my side

 

© Rosie Burnham